Dear Friends, The last time I wrote, I told you I had returned to Bad Aibling, Germany, to Klinik St. Georg, because my breast cancer had become active again in the primary tumor. My plan was to surgically remove the tumor in order to have active cancer cells from which to culture a dendritic vaccine, which basically teaches your immune system to recognize and attack cancer cells, something my immune system has failed to do twice this year. On Friday, I had a consultation with a wonderful Hungarian surgeon in Rosenheim named Dr. Vaczi. I trusted him immediately and only later read that he studied under Prof. Pitanguy in Rio de Janeiro - the world's #1 cosmetic surgeon, where all the Hollywood stars go for their plastic Barbie faces & bodies. This was good reinforcement for the surgery decision, which was very difficult for me. However, while the other women here who are getting the dendritic vaccine have had simple procedures and are in hospital only overnight, it turned out that my own surgery would be much more involved and I would stay in hospital for 5 days. This gave me pause, and I spent the weekend in deep meditation over the whole surgery question. I allowed myself to grieve for my breast (which would probably end up half the size of the healthy breast, since I refused a prosthesis because I don't want toxic plastics under my skin) and to fully accept the idea of surgery. My acceptance of the surgery meant that any decision would be based on rational thinking, not on fear of surgery or attachment to my breast, which was very important to me. Problem: I feel that surgery is very damaging to the body. I believe that removal of the primary tumor can cause the cancer to metastasize to other organs, and I worried that if this happened, we would end up chasing new cancer around with the vaccine. While here at Klinik St. Georg, I have been working with a wonderful Reiki practitioner named Mo Wilke. In addition to Reiki, Mo practices something called BodyTalk, a rather new system which combines principles of Reiki, acupuncture, etc., and uses muscle testing to ask your body for answers. BodyTalk is a practical system for reconnecting blocked or broken energy meridians in the body. To some of you, this may sound like mumbo-jumbo, but I can tell you that one session led to my being able to breathe easily through my nose (which has been broken a number of times, leading to a mangled deviated septum) for the first time in 25 years. We have been addressing many levels of healing with BodyTalk: physical, emotional, chakras, etc. I believe that the reasons I got cancer in the first place have to do with old emotional scars and belief patterns, which have gradually led to layers of physical dysfunction. I mentioned in my letter last week that the shock over my friend's terrible death in a fire in April led to a serious depression which in turn depressed my immune system. Two months later we found active cancer cells in the primary tumor again. So I really feel that the reason the cancer returned was due to the fact that, although the biological treatments here at Klinik St. Georg swiftly killed the original cancer in Jan-Feb. this year, the emotional issues were not addressed or healed. My meditations over the weekend led me to conclude that the cancer is really just a sort of illusion, and that the REAL work I need to do is on many other levels than physical. I think the cancer brought me back to the Klinik in order to work with Mo. I also realized that the proposed surgery would be in contradiction to my inherent belief that cancer can be cured without damage to healthy tissue. My wonderful physician, Prof. Douwes, was also somewhat taken aback when he learned of the severity of the proposed surgery. I asked if he had any reason to believe that we could not kill the cancer with just the biological treatments (hyperthermia - heat; galvanotherapy - tumor electrocutions; and immunotherapy, building the immune system with vitamin IVs, etc.). He said of course not. He had simply wanted to offer me the possibility to help my immune system fight cancer with the dendritic vaccine. I told Prof. Douwes on Monday that I believe that if I address the emotional causes for the cancer this time and heal these, the cancer will not return. He seemed very pleased with my decision, and yesterday I had both galvanotherapy and local hyperthermia again. (We had stopped aggressive treatments last week in order to preserve active cancer cells for the vaccine.) I feel very positive and happy about this decision to skip the surgery and vaccine, to focus on healing the deeper causes rather than worrying over the cancer, which I believe is just a physical symptom. This choice was made from a place of clear light and power, not fear. As if to confirm that my decision was so very right, today a new sonogram showed that the cancer cells in the primary tumor are already about 80% DEAD! We had also found 3 small satellite tumors last week. Two of them have vanished, and the 3rd has returned to normal tissue. (This also makes me think that the surgery might not have produced enough active cancer cells to make an effective vaccine, but would only have damaged my body.) I will stay here at the Klinik long enough to complete my BodyTalk work with Mo, and kill off the rest of the cancer cells with Prof. Douwes. I believe this will take no more than 1-2 more weeks. It is my deep conviction that fear of cancer will kill us much faster than physical aspects such eating an absolutely perfect diet, etc., and that focusing too intensely on disease and physical cure does not produce true healing and complete wellness. I am very thankful for this opportunity to heal on all levels, not only physical. And I am also fortunate to have found such a wonderful doctor, who I have no doubt will quickly rid me of the remaining cancer. I'm so grateful to all of you for your love and support and beautiful letters, as well as much practical advice and faith in my choices. Much love and light - and joy! Liz Meyer Awaiting biopsy results 8/12/01 8/17/01 Cancer Free Remember we are NOT Doctors and have NO medical training. This site is like an Encylopedia - there are many pages, many links on many topics. Support our work with any size DONATION - see left side of any page - for how to donate. You can help raise awareness of CAM.